via PureTravel
Ah long distance. This phrase is something that I have been constantly hearing and thinking about constantly for the past 10 weeks. From facing a 9 hour time difference with my family to being 6,000 miles away from my boyfriend to falling in and out of touch with friends on campus and at home, the term studying abroad feels just a little too appropriate sometimes. My days are filled with calculations miles and hours that lead up to the time when I can physically be with the people I love, while simultaneously hanging onto the time I have to live in Rome now that I feel pretty at home.
A lot of people-- from close friends to readers of my blog-- have asked me how to make the most of your time apart with friends, family and significant others.
I wish I could say I knew the secret. This is something I am still trying to figure out!
Long distance in any capacity is a tradeoff. You want to spend 100 percent of your time enjoying where you are and 100 percent of your time talking to the people you miss, which is obviously impossible.
Ultimately, finding a balance between the past, the present and the future is what makes spending time apart from loved ones much easier and more fulfilling (which isn't to say it is easy at all!).
I've put together a few tips to help make finding this balance a little easier and to aid those who are apart in realizing that distance can just be limited to physical, rather than emotional, space:
Prioritize: Being smart about your time while abroad is important. During the day, my priority is to see and experience as much of Rome as possible. Given the time difference, this has actually been pretty convenient as everyone I know is asleep until 2 or 3 PM Rome time. Therefore, in the evening and at night I choose to spend more time catching up. Maintaining this balance has been important as I feel like I am getting a lot out of my time abroad but am also able to stay in touch with the people I care about.
Communicate: Having an international phone and text messaging plan has really made a huge difference in my relationships. Knowing my loved ones are just a text message or phone call away makes the distance seem much smaller. On that note, there's nothing like sending or receiving a letter. I have been sending a ton of postcards to my parents, grandmother and of course, my boyfriend. I literally get to send little snapshots of my trip I wish I could share with them in person.
Trust Each Other: This applies mostly to significant others, but having a relationship grounded in a strong sense of trust is really important. I had been very close friends with my boyfriend for a little under a year before we started dating. We have known each other for so long that I really do trust him with anything. It's not to say that distance doesn't make us all a little paranoid at times, but in reality I think being apart has made us trust each other more-- and despite the thousands of miles, I feel closer to him every day.
Stay Positive: Being apart is simply the worst. But it is a reality that everyone has to deal with at some point. My boyfriend does a really excellent job of keeping busy and focusing on the positive (like just how great it will be to see each other for the first time in 6 weeks!) and has inspired me to fill my days with more than just class-- sightseeing excursions, blog posts, time with friends and lots of delicious coffee.
Be Honest: On a similar note, when I'm having a bad day (these even happen in the Eternal City), the first people I turn to are the people I care about (who are for the most part, unfortunately far away). They really always know how to cheer me up. Being honest about how I'm doing allows me to deal with the not-so-great times as they come, rather than letting them build up to a point of meltdown.
Talk About the Future: Whenever distance really gets me down (which I admit has happened a few times), my family, friends and boyfriend have all reminded me about what there is to look forward to. And the closer it gets, the more I am motivated to spend my last weeks enjoying all that Italy has to offer. Having a definitive end point where my boyfriend and I won't be apart has made especially the last couple of weeks markedly easier.
As they say, distance makes the heart grow fonder!
xoxo
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